May 27, 2012

It’s Just A Click Away

Good morning and greetings, season finale fans. As some of my followers in cyber space may have picked up on, every once in a while I have to force myself to relax, which inevitably leads to some TV research. I try to limit myself to under 50 shows a week, which includes sports, sitcoms, dramas, late night, national news, fake news, and any news magazine program involving true crime. It’s a tireless, daunting task, but as I’ve asked myself many times as I zip through the commercials, “If not me, then who?” It’s like being on a mission from Neilson gods.

So when I read this story last week, it hit me like a ton of Philadelphia cream cheese bricks. In a article written by Carla K .Johnson for the Associated Press, Eugene Polly, who is credited with perhaps the world’s greatest invention besides the Slinky, died last Sunday in Chicago at the age of 96. His invention, the first wireless TV remote control, began as a luxury, but with the introduction of hundreds of channels, it became a necessity, much like my Ultra Plush electrically heated toilet seat.

Back in the black and white days in 1955, if you wanted to switch channels from the Phil Silvers show to The Honeymooners, you had to do what the early pioneers and Donner party did. You had to get up off the couch stroll across the room and turn a knob. For the youth of today, this would be considered prehistoric. It would be like living with a modern stone age family like the Flintstones, except there was no yabba dabba doo time.

But then came Eugene Polley’s miracle invention. Thanks to Geno, you could purchase a new Zenith television with a wireless remote control called the Flash-Matic. It was a green, ray gun-shaped contraption with a red trigger that was very temperamental, requiring precise angling to work successfully. It was a huge advancement from Zenith’s first TV remote, a device called the “Lazy Bones,” which was connected to the TV set by a wire cord. With the Flash-Matic, it was channel surfing city.

The advertising at the time promised “TV miracles.” Zenith and the Parent Televison Council claimed the “flash tuner” was “Absolutely harmless to humans!” And most intriguing of all: “You can even shut off annoying commercials while the picture remains on the screen.” Gadzooks and great balls of fire, this man was a genuis. Now if he had just invented something that could help me find my remote, I’d be in TiVo heaven.

Polley’s Flash-Matic pointed a beam of light at photo cells in the corners of the television screen. Each corner activated a different function, turning the picture and sound off and on, and changing the channels. This is beyond my realm of understanding, as I still don’t know how the TV picture gets inside the screen. Or how cell phones can work so quickly or computers come up with searches instantaneously. Or as George Orwell once told me, “He who controls the present, controls the past. And he who controls the past, remote controls the future.”

To wrap this up, here’s a thought from David Lazarus at “Gush all you want about Facebook, Twitter and other recent tech innovations. I’d stack Eugene Polley and his TV remote against all of them. After all, which would you be more willing to give up — Facebook or your remote? … Thought so.” Dave, I couldn’t have tweeted that better myself.

Moving along, last Wednesday, as I walked along West Cliff on a low tide morning, I spotted two great blue herons standing in the sea grass. I looked on in amazement, as over a period of 27 years, I could count on three fingers the numbers of herons I had actually spotted in the ocean. I didn’t have my camera with me, but I returned to one of the locations the next day and there it was (photo #1.) I’ve included three other photos of some great blues from over the years to keep this great bird company.

In other aviary news, the comorants have set up shop and built their nests at the end of West Cliff Drive (photos 5 & 6,) just outside of Natural Bridges State Beach. The females will lay their eggs, the babies will hatch and their will be new life along the cliff. It’s a reassuring sight to see on a daily basis, and I’ll keep you updated as to when the storks arrive.

On to some late night. “Here’s an election update. Today Mitt Romney met with a group of wealthy Latino business owners. Or as Romney calls them, ‘the Juan percent.’” –Jimmy Fallon “Mitt Romney and his family have a big two-day weekend plan. They’re going to hike to the top of his money.” –David Letterman

“I know why you’re happy. Facebook went public and you’re all billionaires now. It is worth one hundred and four billion dollars. There has got to be a cheaper way to find out if your ex-girlfriend got fat. For the first time in our history, more minority children were born in America than white children. And today the Octomom said, ‘I’m on it.’” –Bill Maher

“Mark Zuckerberg got married a couple of days ago. At their wedding, Zuckerberg’s wife wore a dress that cost nearly $5,000. That is until the dress went public. Now it’s worth $2,000.” –Conan O’Brien “There has been another new development in the Secret Service prostitution scandal… (Some agents) say this kind of thing is so common that internally they refer to it as the Secret Circus. Which explains why they were trying to pay the hookers peanuts.” –Jimmy Kimmel

So that’s our last blast for May 2012. Birthday wishes go out today to my lovely sister-in-law Wendi, who turns the big 50. She is the queen of comments here at Sunrise Santa Cruz and someone who really gets it. Who doesn’t love a woman whose wedding invitations were made out of chocolate?

And our Thursday, my snow boarding brother Brad’s favorite son Miles becomes a teenager. Congratulations and follow your shot.

So spend a moment today thinking what Memorial Day is all about and the sacrifices our military families make. We’ll catch you having your knee drained and then taking it to the hoop like a madman. Aloha, mahalo and later, Dwyane Wade fans.

May 20, 2012

You Go Ahead, I’ll Ketchup

Good morning and greetings, prom night fans. As you know, I like to report on the important news stories and trends of the day. Last week, I wrote about the dynamic duo of milk and cookies, a subject I am quite familiar with due to my ongoing research and subsequent weight gains. As Jenny Craig’s nutritionist once told me, “I try to keep losing weight, but it keeps finding me. But I often think back to the words of Drew Barrymore who once said, “I’d rather be a few pounds heavier and enjoy life.”

So while we’re on that subject, here’s a couple of helpful tips from a Mr. Larry Wentz when it comes to weight loss. Only eat food that you can catch and kill with a toothpick and even better, weigh yourself with only one foot on the scale. Or as Julia Child told Richard Simmons, “The only time I eat diet food is when I’m waiting for a steak to cook.”

Well, speaking of meating and greeting, as part of my vegan diet that includes beef, poultry and fish, I like to dine on the occasional cheeseburger and fries. It’s not so much that I enjoy the taste of these two American food staples, it more like a colonic cleansing of my digestive system. And what condiment goes hand-in-mouth with these two delectable dishes? Our friend, the Duke of Ketchup.

According to Piper Weiss of, an estimated 97 percent of American households have a bottle of ketchup or vodka in their refrigerators at this moment. If you’re like me, and that’s saying something, you prefer Heinz’ original recipe, which consists of tomatoes, vinegar, high fructose corn syrup, salt, spice, onion powder and some other “natural flavorings” the company and the Defense Department isn’t required to list.

But before Heinz, ketchup, sweet and sour sauce, black bean sauce, apple sauce, Santa Claus or even catsup, there was katchop. Many believe the name is derived from the word koechiap or ke-tsiap, which comes from the Amoy dialect of China. Roughly translated, these words mean the brine of shell fish and yes, you can super size those fries. This Chinese condiment, from which our can’t live without burger, hot dog and french fry topping originated, was nothing more than shellfish brine, not the red devil that we lather on like shaving cream.

But hold on to your golden arches, as this mixture of tiny sea creatures, soaked for days in pickling vinegar and the Colonel’s secret herbs and spices, was the basis for the delectable dip we know, love and worship today.

When British explorers caught wind of it in Singapore in the 1700s, they brought it back to their own Western European kitchens along with a large order to go of chow fun, lo mein and cream cheese filled won tons. The result was the first ketchup recipe, a mixture of vinegar, gene shallots, spices, horseradish, anchovies, paulie walnuts, mushrooms, kidney beans alongside a boatload of napkins.

The first English recipe on record, published in a 1727 cookbook, called for 12 to 14 anchovies and zero tomatoes. We’re not talking about that sweet and tangy sauce made from pureed tomatoes. It was really more of a fish recipe than a condiment, but without the Food Channel, who knew?

Ketchup made from pickled oyster juice was another early popular dipping sauce, something I wouldn’t even serve to the Taliban. Other early versions of ketchup had flavors like blueberries, lemon, grape, watermelon and strawberry mango. It wasn’t until the 1820′s that tomatoes got involved in the mix, as Heinz brought the bottled version to homes and Burger King in the 1870s.

But let us not forget that Heinz also introduced ‘funky purple’ and ‘blastin’ green’ EZ Squirts ketchup, along with pink, orange, teal and blue versions of America’s favorite condiment. I don’t know about you, but I like my ketchup red, the same color as my high school gang, the Anderson Avenue Bloods.

Due to a tomato shortage during World War II, Filipinos began making ketchup out of the abundant banana crop, yielding a much sweeter brownish yellow sauce which was then dyed red. Filipinos liked banana ketchup so much that it has outsold tomato ketchup ever since and the Abu Sayyaf Terrorist Group swears they would never consider kidnapping helpless tourists and holding them for ransom without it.

Here are a couple more fun facts. The French, who have made surrendering an art, recently banned ketchup in many schools to discourage obsessive dipping and in particular, double dipping. Ketchup is similar to wine in that there are good and bad ketchup years depending on the tomato harvest. I can remember back in the early days when my wife and I were first dating, we would go out to West Cliff at dusk and open a bottle of ketchup and watch the sunset.

And finally, let’s finish this segment off with a joke that has nothing to do with ketchup. A penguin walked into a bar and said, “Has my father been in here today?” The bartender said, “”I don’t know, what does he look like?” The penguin said, “He was wearing a tuxedo.”

For today’s photo discourse, we are once again heading up the North Coast to Hole-In-The-Wall Beach and Panther Beach. If you are wondering where the first name came from, check out photo #3. The natural beauty of these beaches is as stunning as my modeling portfolio, and colors of the limestone cliffs (photo #4) are nothing short of spectacular. And as a bonus, the waves were booming the whole time while my daughter and I were there, creating a show of spray (photo #6) that was well worth the price of free admission.

On to some late night. “There was a huge fundraiser for President Obama at George Clooney’s house last Thursday night. They raised over $15 million. Actually, one awkward moment: When they were handing President Obama the check… the Chinese ambassador stepped in and said, ‘I believe that belongs to us.’” –Jay Leno “President Obama and Mitt Romney both gave commencement speeches over the last few days. Obama was like, ‘You can be whatever you want to be,’ while Romney was like, ‘I can be whatever you want me to be.’” –Jimmy Fallon

“During his commencement speech at Liberty University, Mitt Romney revealed that his campaign staff loves Chick-fil-A. The other thing he revealed? — that he doesn’t know what to say in a commencement speech.” –Jimmy Fallon “When Mitt was in prep school he led a pack of his friends to forcibly hold down this sensitive gay kid as he screamed and cried, and then cut off his hair, because he had too long hair for Mitt’s tastes. And today Mitt’s dog said, ‘I thought I had it bad.” –Bill Maher

“I don’t know what it’s like at your salon, but at mine, isn’t the guy cutting the hair the gay one?” –Bill Maher “This has become quite a story; the Washington Post reported that Mitt Romney, while in high school, bullied a gay classmate. Did you hear about this story? In his defense, Romney said that he didn’t know the kid was gay; he just thought he was poor.” –Jay Leno

“Today Newt Gingrich didn’t agree or disagree on the gay marriage thing. However, he did say there should be a term limit on all marriages.” –Jay Leno “Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg turned 28 this week. He got a watch from his girlfriend, a sweater
from his parents, and from the rest of us, all of our credit card numbers.” –Conan O’Brien “As of Friday you’ll all be able to buy shares of Facebook. This is perfect for anyone who’s ever logged on, looked at pictures of their friend eating a sandwich, and thought, ‘Now there’s a sound investment.’” –Conan O’Brien

So that’s our pre Memorial Day weekend blast. Birthday wishes go out on Friday to my lovely wife Allison. Not a day has gone by in the last 24 years that I haven’t wondered, did she really marry me just for my looks? As I’ve said before and I’ll say again, besides TiVo, she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Not everyone gets so lucky.

And on the same day my old Motown pal, Marc Techner, celebrates his birth rite. Marc grew up in Detroit and now lives right off the beach on the west side of Santa Cruz. That’s called trading up.

We’ll catch you showing NBA fans what being classy and a champion is all about. Aloha, mahalo and later, Tim Duncan fans.

May 13, 2012

Milk Does A Blogger Good

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , — geoff @ 4:49 pm

Good morning and greetings, healthy snack fans. I remember a few years back going in for my annual physical, and my doctor suggested that it wouldn’t hurt if I lost a few pounds. I immediately thought of what Ellen Degeneres once told me. “You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the hell she is.”

My doctor asked me about my diet and exercise regimen and then asked, “So, can you stop eating cookies?” I replied, “Hey, I’m a man’s man. Of course, I could cut back on my sugar intake. I’ll start right after I see Haley’s comet.”

Let’s fast forward to today, where at age 59, I’m still a growing boy and enjoy the comforting duo of milk and cookies. Actually, I don’t really need the milk, just give me the cookies. But since milk supposedly does a body good, I like to include it in my daily vegan regimen whenever there’s a substance full of sugar, sodium and saturated fat that I can hold in my hand.

So being that I’ve been pounding down the Grade A, Pasteurized, Homogenized, 1% lowfat milk with vitamins A & D like a camel on spring break, I thought it might be a good time to take a look at what goes into the making of this fantasticly nutritious white liquid. Or as Robert Fulghum once said, “Think what a better world it would be if we all, the whole world, had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down on our blankets for a nap.”

So according to my friends at the Legacy Farms in Plainview, Texas, cows, like teenage boys, have a unique digestive system that includes four stomachs. They swallow food quickly without chewing it well and store it in their first and second stomachs. After they have eaten their fill, they will burp up a small portion of the food they have stored in their first and second stomachs without saying “Excuse me.” This small portion of food is called cud or quiche.

They will then chew this cud and swallow it to their third stomach. After that the food leaves their third stomach it enters their fourth stomach where the digestion and indigestion occurs. Amd that’s why four out of five dairy farmers recommend Pepto-Bismal for their cows that chew cud.

Cows spend about six hours eating per day and chow down about 90 pounds of food in that time, not including appetizers, jello or finger foods. It takes about two days for a cow to process her food into milk, three days for chocolate milk.

And since I’m not lactose intolerant, here are some more fun facts about about the liquid that I consider to be our national beverage. Well, either that or Jolt Cola.

It used to take a person one hour to milk six cows by hand. Today, a person can milk 100 cows and a billy goat in an hour with modern machines and a vivid imagination. In case you weren’t counting, it take about 340-350 squirts from Elsie to produce a gallon of milk. Cows drink between 25-50 gallons of water a day to produce milk, and even more if they play contact sports.

In the old days before TiVo, when people traveled and wanted milk, they had to take their cows with them. Cows have an acute sense of smell – they can smell something up to six miles away, particularly a punchline. And as George Bernard Shaw once said, “You cannot have power for good without having power for evil too. Even mother’s milk nourishes murderers as well as heroes.”

Speaking of which, my favorite slogans for breast milk, “Latch on, nod off. Breast milk. Never been recalled.”

The average American cow produces 6.2 gallons a day or about 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime. A cow’s udder can hold 25-50 pounds of milk. Utterly incredible. Most cows give more milk when they listen to music, with their favorites being Soft Rock Hits of the 80′s or anything by Todd Rundgren.

The natural yellow color of butter comes mainly from beta-carotene found in the grass the cows graze on. And finally, as my mother or Aunt Bee from the “Andy Griffith Show” once proclaimed, “Opie, you haven’t finished your milk. We can’t put it back in the cow, you know.”

For today’s photo escapade we are jetting up the coast to Davenport on the evening of May 2. There had been a beautful sunset that I had missed earlier in the week, and after checking out the cloud cover at around 5:30, I thought something special might be on the horizon. I don’t shoot many sunsets in the spring so we’re talking bonus coverage for this cyber experience.

By the time I gathered myself under the Monterey Cypress trees, those early clouds had moved south, but as it turned out, we were still left with a colorful display of May pagentry. I am rarely disappointed whenever I turn on the TV or make a trip to the north coast and this night was no exception.

On to some late night. “Membership and recruiting of Al Qaeda is drying up. Far be it for me to tell terrorists about strategy but I think membership started to subside when they went to the suicide bomber exploding underpants. Let’s just say you put on the exploding underpants and you detonate. When they bring in the 72 virgins, then what?” –David Letterman

“President Obama visited Afghanistan — unplanned, unannounced, just went right to Afghanistan. Not to be outdone, Mitt Romney got in his car and drove through the rough part of Beverly Hills.” –David Letterman “Yesterday New Jersey Governor Chris Christie said he’s not sure if he’s going to run for re-election next year. He’s said, ‘I’ll collapse that bridge when I get to it.’” –Jimmy Fallon

“Usually they do these on TV together, but in this case Santorum made the endorsement in the 13th paragraph of an email he sent out just before midnight. Sounds like somebody had a bottle of sparkling apple cider for dinner. Santorum woke up this morning and said, ‘I endorsed who?’ “President Obama says his campaign for a second term is still about hope and change. The president’s exact words were, ‘I hope I won’t have to change my address.’” –Conan O’Brien

“And the Republicans, of course, were livid that on the anniversary of the killing of bin Laden, that Obama went over there and celebrated that. How dare he run for President using his accomplishments as President. We knew his campaign would be ugly, but stooping to facts? Could you imagine what Bush would have done if he had gotten bin Laden? I mean, this is a guy who played dress-up to celebrate a war he lost. If he had gotten bin Laden, he would have spent his whole second term in a Batman costume.” –Bill Maher

“According to documents recovered from Osama Bin Laden’s compound before his death, the Al Qaeda leader was worried that morale in the terrorist organization was fading. Bin Laden was concerned that his men were so depressed they wouldn’t commit suicide.” –Seth Meyers “In a new interview, Vice President Joe Biden said the sitcom ‘Will & Grace’ made America more comfortable with gay people. Biden also said the sitcom character Urkel made America more comfortable with President Obama.” –Conan O’Brien

“Today Mitt Romney visited a firehouse here in New York City. Of course, he was disappointed when he learned that the firehouse is not where you get to fire people. President Obama hosts an early Cinco de Mayo White House party today. I thought it was weird when he made all the guests climb over the fence to get in. More than 330 million shares of Facebook stock will be sold later this month. It’s great –- now you can own a piece of the website that completely owns YOU.” –Jimmy Fallon

That’s all she wrote for this week. Belated 60th birthday wishes go out to my old friend Susan Hall, who celebrated her big day with cake, ice cream and pony rides last Friday.

We’ll catch you amazing the baseball world by blasting four homers in one game. Aloha, mahalo and later, Josh Hamilton fans.

May 6, 2012

April Showers Bring Gennifer Flowers

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , — geoff @ 8:56 pm

Good morning and greetings, President Clinton fans. Well, time continues to fly like an eagle, as my Beyonce calendar says we’re into the merry, merry month of May. Or as the the Dalai Lama once told me, “Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.” I replied, “You can’t change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying about the future.” Then the Dali came back with, “Don’t sweat it, for today is tomorrow you worried about yesterday. So I got that going for me, which is good.

So April, much like my hopes of figuring out what we’re still trying to accomplish in Afghanistan, is now history, as another month has been filed into my memory and Tyra Banks.

Alas and Iraq, some rain fell during our fourth month, and one morning
I grabbed my camera and headed up to the Arboretum at UCSC to do a
little California dreaming. I love shooting the flowers when they’re moist, as it makes the experience more enjoyable than catching all the green lights.

Then either coincidentally, ironically or for you Spirit fans, Dr.
Sardonicusly, last Monday, when I decided to feature these flowery
photos in the first blast of the new month, the headline story written
by Cathy Kelly in the Santa Cruz Sentinel was about a memorial service
for the founding director of the Arboretum, Ray Collett, who passed away February 22 at the age of 79.

During my wonder years back in the 1960′s, Ray Collett took about 130
acres of empty pasture land and converted it into a horticultural
wonderland, which today is known for its collections of exotic plants
from Australia, New Zealand, Yankee Stadium and South Africa, as well
as some California beauties. We’re talking about a selection of plants
unmatched anywhere in the world, including my own Garden State of New Jersey.

Much like myself, Ray Collett was a visionary. This oasis of international beauty came about when a gentlemen from Hollister needed a home for his fine collection of eucalyptus trees and Hanukkah bushes.

Today, this lovely piece of real estate overlooking Monterey Bay is a
flowing canvas of space-age looking plants along with gangs of rabbits
and occupying hummingbirds. The current director, Brett Hall, says “The Arboretum is Ray’s Living Memorial.” I hope to be as lucky one day, or at least leave behind a few dandelions, a mulberry bush or a small patch of poison oak.

So what do we really know about flowers? Henry Wadsworth Longfellow once said that “flowers are the stars of the earth.” They have been an important part of civilization since before cable. Much like my early modeling years, they have been worshipped for their beauty and grown wherever the grass was green. More importantly, they are given to loved ones to symbolize powerful emotions or when begging for forgiveness.

Like Chaz Bono, flowers can either be male or female. Male flowers
have a stamen that is coated with pollen, thus the derivation of the
words stamina. Hummingbirds, insects and tiny paratroopers fly from
flower to flower and become coated with pollen. The pollen is
eventually transported to a female flower by the pollinator through
various social networking techniques. Flowers use a variety of these
techniques to attract potential pollinators, including tasty nectar,
color displays and offering free websites.

Now here are a some things you may not or may not have wanted to know about flowers. Broccoli is a flower as well as a vegetable, which might explain why I love the beef and broccoli lunch special at Tam’s on
Mission Street. Scientists discovered the world’s oldest flower in 2002, in northeast China. The flower, named Archaefructus sinensis, bloomed around 125 million years ago, resembles a water lily and was found growing in a wheelchair.

According to Better Homes and Garden and Maxim magazine, the
scientific name for plants which produce flowers are called angiosperms, derived from the Greek word “angos” and “sperm” meaning “seed bearing”. The tulip, a symbol of life, love and immortality, actually dates back to the time of Confucius. And as Confucious says, man with one chopstick will go hungry.

And my laurel and hearty congratulations go out to the the Titan Arum.
Not only is it the world’s largest flower it is also the world’s smelliest. This fragrant native of the central Sumatran rainforests is known affectionately as the Corpse Flower for its heady perfume of rotting flesh. Which might lead to the question, “I love your perfume. Is that ten-day old pork chops?

Now to top it off, here are some of my favorite sayings about flowers.
“Earth laughs in flowers”-Ralph Waldo Emerson. “I’d rather have guns
and roses on my table than diamonds on my neck”-Emma Goldman.
Perfumes are the feelings of flowers”-Heinrich Heine.

“I hope some day to meet God, because I want to thank Him for the
flowers”-Robert Brault. “With a few flowers in my garden, half a dozen pictures, some books and a freezer full of Haagen-Dazs bars, I live without envy”- Lope de Vega. “Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them”-A Milne.

“We say we love flowers, yet we pluck them. We say we love trees, yet we cut them down. And people still wonder why some are afraid when told they are loved. I like flowers, I also like children, but I do not chop their heads and keep them in bowls of water around the house”-George Bernard Shaw. “At my age flowers scare me” -George Burns

On to the late night. “Now allegations are coming out that the Secret
Service were partying with strippers and hookers, not just in Colombia
but in El Salvador, Buenos Aires, Moscow. You got to hand it to these
guys. A lot of us look at the world and say, ‘F**k it.’ These people
actually do it.” –Bill Maher “A new campaign video by Barack Obama
implies that Mitt Romney would not have killed Osama bin Laden if he
had been president. Today Romney shot back. He said not only would he have killed bin Laden, he would have strapped him to the roof of his
car and taken him on vacation with him as well.” –Jay Leno

“Mitt Romney is going to have to pick a vice president and apparently
it is between Chris Christie and the senator from Florida, Marco Rubio. So it’s between a Cuban American and a cubic American. Other people say that Mitt should balance the ticket by picking someone who has taken all of the opposite positions of him, like himself.” –Bill Maher

“New Rule: If the Indians have a rocket that works, but the North Koreans don’t, we have to stop being scared of North Korea and start being scared of India. Now, you may ask, why would the Indians launch a missile at us? Well, as Sarah Palin points out we did steal their land. New Rule: Let’s follow Canada, and get rid of the penny. It costs more to make than it’s worth. And we don’t need another copper-colored reminder that government is a useless, stupid boondoggle. We already have John Boehner.” –Bill Maher

“So let me get this straight. Republicans, you’re annoyed by the arrogance and braggadocio of a wartime President’s political ad. You
think he’s divisively and unfairly belittling his opponents, I see. I have a question: ARE YOU ON CRACK??? Were you alive, lo, these past ten years? It seems unseemly for the President to spike the football. Bush landed on a fucking aircraft carrier with a football-stuffed codpiece; he spiked the football before the game had even started!” -Jon Stewart, blasting GOP hypocrisy over President Obama’s Osama bin Laden ad

That’s our first journey into May. It was a good week on the whale watching front, as the humpbacks are traveling along the coast. Last Thursday there were three hanging in the kelp beds off of West Cliff less than 100 yards off shore. Always a pleasant way to start the day.

And I’m not a big fan of war, but a book written by prize-winning war
correspondent Dexter Filkins titled “The Forever War” is one you will
not want to put down. He was there for the rise of the Taliban in Afghanistan and when Saddam was toppled in Iraq. It is brutally honest, sad and compassionate. Just something to pick up if you’re looking to do some light reading. Dexter Filkins is simply outstanding and, like myself, incredibly courageous.

So it’s early May and soon to be 38-year-old Derek Jeter is hitting
.397 to go along with a league-leading 48 hits. Too bad he can’t
pitch. We’ll catch you shagging flies in the outfield. Aloha, mahalo
and later, Mariano Rivera fans.

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