February 28, 2010

Pedal To The Medals

Good morning and greetings, ice dancing fans. Yes, February 2010, much like my keen eyesight, razor-sharp hearing and six pack abs, is now history. Our second month of the year is unique, as much like my status in my high school hoops days, it is the shortest month on the calendar and flies by faster than my son in the open court with his new driving permit.

February also brought us the Winter Olympics from Vancouver, Canada. For those of you who may have missed out any news from north of the border, today we are featuring complete gold medal coverage from our award-winning correspondent from north of the Golden Gate Bridge. Now here, in his own words, is the guy who followed me out our mother’s birth canal, Paul Gilbert.

For the last two weeks, I’ve been a visitor in the beautiful city of Vancouver, British Columbia. Well, it’s been more of a virtual vacation, as I’ve been riveted to my TV set watching the 2010 Winter Olympic Games. I didn’t think I’d be anywhere as interested in them as the Summer Games, but once the curling competition started, I was hooked. C’mon, name another sport where your team includes people sweeping brooms like they’ve just had 50 triple espressos? I wish they would come over and clean our house.

There was such a potpourri of athletic competition to choose from, it was like sifting through the menu at a Cheesecake Factory. To get things off on the right ski, I was curious to see if Lindsay Vonn would look as good in high def as she did in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue. Actually, I was hoping that Brooklyn Decker would qualify in the Super G-string and wear her cover outfit, which was the size of a large snowflake.

As it turns out, Vonn ended up riding a roller coaster on the slopes. Gold medal, crashes, disqualifications, and the media doing everything it could to provoke a cat fight with her teammate, Julie Mancuso, who clearly did not enjoy playing second fiddle, especially after getting the unintentional shaft in the slalom, when Vonn did a pinky swear with the snow fence. The fact is both are great athletes and male or female, it takes a lot of balls to compete in a sport where you’re hurdling down an ice-covered mountain at 90 MPH.

Loved those crazy, high-flying snowboarders working the half-pipe (which they used to smoke after each competition, until the Olympic drug-testers ruined the party). Shaun White was truly amazing, as evidenced by replays that compared his run with the second place finisher and White was about 20 feet higher (OK, insert joke here). We all know he created his best tricks on the private half-pipe his sponsor, Red Bull, built him in Colorado and the question is, does his famous Double McTwist 1260 come with fries?

I enjoyed some of the speed skating events, especially the short tracks where competitors jockeyed for position like New York City cab drivers. The South Koreans were amazing, I wonder when they became a speed skating superpower, id the North Koreans threatened a nuclear response? I think the Dutch coach might want to take a long vacation before heading home for his public execution and I’m now considering wearing a red headband, growing a little soul patch and changing my name to Apolo. Oh-yes.

In deference to my lovely wife, I also watched some of the ice dancing. There are moments of grace and artistry, but whoever designs those costumes must be the rejects from the first round of Project Runway. It’s hard to take a sport seriously where the athletes dress like Halloween on Acid on Ice.

The figure skating competition felt a little drawn out, but since I can barely stand on a pair of skates, I have to admire the skill of these athletes and their ability to perform under pressure. I was glad to see Evan Lysacek beat that sourpuss, sore loser Russian. That’s what you get for dressing like Lenin doing Liberace and having a bad shag haircut.

On the women’s side, Yu Na Kim of South Korea breathtaking and seemingly effortless performance was mesmerizing. And whose heart didn’t go out to Joannie Rochette, the Canadian skater whose mother died on her way to watch her compete? This reminded me of the many side stories that make up a whole other side of the Olympics, which is how an athlete’s parents sacrifice their time, energy and money to support their children and then, have to live vicariously through the both victories and the defeats. Truly, the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat.

As usual, NBC decided to tape delay the most popular events and play them back in prime time. That meant I had to avoid reading the news online or watching SportsCenter before I tuned in for my nightly Olympics fix. And since the New York Times is my browser homepage, it’s hard not to notice when you see a headline like USA UPSETS CANADA!! Then again, haven’t the Canadians been upset with us for the last forty or fifty years?

The USA hockey team beating Canada in the first round was immensely satisfying. I don’t watch a lot of hockey, except for the Stanley Cup Playoffs, which are incredibly intense, but this was just as riveting. My adrenaline was pumping so hard that I was throwing crosschecks into my son and got called for high-sticking the dog.

The gold medal game was equally intense, a fitting end to the Olympic competition. Just when it looked like Canada had it in the bag, Team USA scores with twenty-four seconds left to send it into overtime, which put the entire population of Canada on suicide watch and sent our puppy into a frenzied “who let the dogs out, eh?” But in the end, hockey’s best player, Sidney Crosby, did what the great ones do. Will his way to victory. So as for as a repeat of “do you believe in miracles?” let’s see if the Knicks sign LeBron.

As for the TV coverage, there were so many commercial breaks that Bob Costas might as well have said “we’ll be right back after this brief glimpse of actual sports action to bring you more commercials from Vancouver.” I don’t quite understand how NBC can claim to have lost $200 million on these Games, when they ran 200 million commercials.

Got to give Costas his due, he’s the consummate pro. He switches seamlessly from sport to sport and brings out the best in his guests. NBC pulled out all the stops on the various commentators and expert analysts in each sport, but one person who received mixed scores in my book was Mary Carillo. Some of her up close and personal pieces were good, but when it comes to late night comedy, she ain’t exactly Wanda Sykes.

All kidding aside, the reason I enjoyed watching the Winter Games so much was to see great athletes competing at the highest level of their sports. They have put in thousands of hours of practice, endured injuries and hardship, and basically dedicated their entire lives to perfecting their performances. While some are multi-millionaire professionals, the majority are not making the big bucks. They’re doing it for the love of their sport, the honor of representing their country and the ultimate challenge of being the best in the entire world at what they do. No matter how bureaucratic and corporate the Olympics have become, in many ways, it’s still the purest and deepest experience in the sports universe.

So it was a great ride while it lasted and now, looking ahead to the 2014 Winter Games in Sochi, Russia, my daughter is immersed in her training for Olympic Gold in Downhill Texting. And knowing her, she’s already planning the photo shoot for Sports Illustrated.

Do me a favor, cancel your subscriptions, now.

Whew. Thank you, brother. Now, being a big fan of the lunar year, I’m always jacked up for the start of the new month and flipping to a fresh page of the calendar. It’s the same feeling I get when popping off the top of a Tropicana Orange Juice or ripping open a package of Pepperidge Farm Orange Milano cookies, a semi-religious experience without the jolt of sugar. I was going to blast out some fabulous winter color to welcome the Ides of March, but then Friday evening came so we shifted Disraeli gears.

Ominous-looking storm clouds and herbal tea had been brewing all morning, as the heavy rain started to fall in the early afternoon. Throughout the day, the sky was as gray as Richard Gere’s hair at a Free Tibet fundraiser. Towards early evening, I gazed into the western sky and spotted an opening in the horizon (photo #1.) At the same time, clouds were coming forward from the east and a small rainbow made an appearance (photo #2.) It paled in comparison to the rainbows I viewed on Saturday in San Jose, which were as fabulous as the dialogue in “The Hangover.”

The wind was whipping off the coast as the sun slowly dropped thru the cloud cover and cast a gorgeous shining light on the churning waves (photos #3-4-5) before disappearing and heading to China. Adding to my dusk delight, hundreds of gulls were cruising south as a full moon appeared from behind the clouds (photo #6). Bingo! A fantastic end to a day that had shown no potential for greatness just minutes earlier. Kind of like Conan O’Brien’s final “Tonight Show” appearance.

On to some late night humor. “The Winter Olympics is apparently a big thing for a lot of people, and America has won the most medals. The only sport I really get into is snowboarding because that’s the only sport where they perform a half pipe just after smoking a full pipe.” –Bill Maher Dick Cheney loves snowboarding. He thinks it’s waterboarding, but colder.” –David Letterman “Tiger Woods was adamant that his wife Elin never hit him with a golf club. I guess his Escalade fell down the stairs.” –Jimmy Kimmel

It’s a great day for former Vice President Dick Cheney, who was released from the hospital today. He’s doing well. Doctors say he’ll be up and shooting lawyers in no time.” –Craig Ferguson “Something weird happened in the hospital. When they were putting the electrodes on him for the EKG, he suddenly started screaming, ‘Stop! I’ll tell you everything you want to know! It was a fun day for the head of Toyota U.S.A. today. He had to appear in front of Congress. “I have to say, it was actually refreshing to see a car company C.E.O. appear before Congress and not ask for $10 billion.” –Jimmy Kimmel

So that’s our first blast for the month of March. Coming up next week, we’re going to continue the guest mode as we’ll feature nature photographer Judy Bingham on these cyber pages. This will be a pick six pack of photos you will not want to miss. So I hope you enjoyed our Olympic coverage as we can now return our full attention to the NBA and SCCAL varsity volleyball. We’ll catch you in the paint. Aloha, mahalo and later, Stephen Curry fans.

February 14, 2010

The Few, The Clouds, The Marines

Good morning and greetings, winter weather fans. Last week, the Atlantic seaboard was bombarded with two blizzards that led to record snowfall, so much so that it completely shut down Washington D.C. for three days, but not the lips of Sarah Palin. Her criticism of President Obama was somewhat puzzling for a woman who admits to not reading a newspaper. But give the former Lens Crafter model and governor of Alaska credit, she was able to read the crib notes written in her palm so that she wouldn’t forget what planet she was on.

Now perhaps I’m being a bit harsh towards the former Vice-Presidential candidate, and if that’s the case, I don’t apologize. How she is being touted as a presidential candidate for 2012 is more mind-blowing than the Warrior’s Monta Ellis not being selected to the western conference’s all-star team. But for now, let’s leave her politics back east and get back to the weather, which was as wild on the central coast this past Tuesday as the snow drifts around the George Jefferson Memorial.

Storm clouds were lined up across the sky and the air was chilly as I headed out onto West Cliff, but fortunately I had come prepared and put on a warmer pair of shorts. The sun was darting in and out from behind the clouds as the light was changing quicker than Peyton Manning’s status from Super Bowl hero to goat. A flock of 35 pelicans (yes, I counted them) flew by in a v-formation, and then all of a sudden turned around in mid-flight faster than you could say “Happy Valentine’s Day” and started heading north. Now, I’ve seen hundreds of squadrons of these prehistoric birds in action, but I had never seen this about-face manuever. There was some strange magic in the air as I really wanted to be pelican briefed.

As I continued my sentimental journey down the cliff, I was joined by an artist friend of mine, who brought up the poet Mary Oliver. Her work focuses on her intense observations of nature from her walks through the wetlands near her home in Massachusetts. She has been called a visionary as “her poetry combines dark interpretation with joyous release.” That would be in contrast to yours truly, who combines dark meat chicken with jellied cranberry sauce.
As the skies starten to darken, I told my friend that I knew where Ms. Oliver was coming from, as when patrolling the coastline, I am always looking for images to capture for my digital sonnets. Mary Oliver says that the self is only strengthened through an immersion with nature. Well, that and NBA basketball.

We continued skipping down the cliff when a rain squall hit while the sun peeked thru the clouds. This meant it was rainbow time. And sure enough, before I could click my feet, grab little Toto and head back to Kansas, a spectrum of light with beautiful colors appeared in the sky. Now, I should mention I wasn’t carrying my camera on this expedition, so I just had to take in the moment for what it was. And in the words of Richard Starkey, better known as Ringo Starr, “you know it don’t come easy”

It reminded me of a rainbow I saw early in the morning on the cliff some thirty years ago. I lived on West Cliff Drive from 1975-89 and it was the only rainbow I remember appearing in the western sky. All the others made appearances from the east or the south. And in case NASA, the weather channel or classmates.com is monitoring this report, yes, I do have photos of that multicolored beauty. Oh, and I also have pictures of the rainbow.

It was actually the second rainbow I had seen that morning, so I was already feeling my lucky charms. And as we all know, they’re magically delicious. My son had a basketball game in Monterey in the afternoon, so we headed south down Highway 1. The clouds were performing a matinee show and you could see the rain falling over the mountains in the distance. I then glanced into the rear view mirror and saw a rainbow as big as bus and brighter than Albert Einstein. My son asked me if he should make a wish and I replied, “No, just hit a few three-pointers and I’ll be happy.”

When we arrived at the gymnasium, all the talk from the parents was, “Did you see that rainbow? And did anyone bring water?” It was one of the all-time brightest, shining bows. Jason and I had seen one like that a few weeks earlier as we exited the Oracle Arena after an afternoon contest on Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday. It was beaming so intently into the Oakland hills that at the time I thought, these colors are just unbelievable. Actually, what was even more unbelievable was that fact the Warriors won that day.

So, you’re probably wondering, where are those rainbow shots and how the hell did they Warriors win? Due to election coverage, there were no photos that day. But to make up for the lack of images from Tuesday’s refracted, reflected and neglected light show, we’re going to dig into the 2010 archives and unearth another recent winter olympic classic.

The date was January 22, and it was late afternoon as I perused the thundercloud-filled sky. I started off by shooting the clouds over the wharf and Boardwalk, before heading down West Cliff and stopping at Woodrow Avenue to take in the sun hiding below the clouds. I then took in the clouds streaming from the north as the sets rolled in at Stockton Avenue. The last shot is from Natural Bridges, looking south back towards Lighthouse Point. All in all, a lot of drama in the sky on this rainbow-less night. Oh, and in case you missed the box score, Jason’s team won going away and clinched it’s first league title.

On to the Conan O’Brien-less late night humor. “Well, tomorrow in Nashville, Sarah Palin will speak at the Tea Party Convention. Tickets are $550 apiece. But Sarah Palin said she will not benefit from the speech. See, that way she’ll have something in common with the people in the audience.” –Jay Leno “I’ll tell you, you woke up this morning, and New York, a tremendous sight. I mean, it was whiter than a Tea Party rally. People are still talking about the Super Bowl. It was the most watched TV program of all time. The second most-watched event was the episode of ‘Dallas’ where J.R. gets shot in the face by Dick Cheney. This President Obama, I mean, give the guy credit. He keeps working and working and working. He’s going to invite a bunch of Republicans to have a televised debate on healthcare. It’s going to be a big, big event. As a matter of fact, at halftime The Who will be there doing a special song about Lipitor.” –David Letterman

“Sarah Palin’s also getting criticized because last week she demanded that Obama’s chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, step down because he used the word retarded. But then, Rush Limbaugh did the same thing on his radio show and that, she said, was O.K. Unfortunately, she’s been unable to respond to the criticism because she’s wearing mittens. The federal government was shut down today, and they estimate it cost about $100 million in lost productivity. The House is literally stuck in the House, and they can’t do anything. I have to admit, it is nice to see lawmakers shoveling something else for a change, isn’t it?” –Jimmy Kimmel “Hey, be glad you’re not back East. Huge snowstorms. I don’t think Washington has seen a snow job like this since that last stimulus package.” –Jay Leno

“And with all this snow, President Obama told all nonessential White House employees they didn’t have to come in. Well, actually, just Joe Biden. It was so cold, Nancy Pelosi had to sit in her driveway for 10 minutes defrosting her eyeballs.
It was so cold, Sarah Palin had to cancel a speech because she didn’t want to take her gloves off to read.” –Jay Leno “Did everybody watch the Super Bowl? Everybody’s happy for New Orleans. In fact, FEMA announced plans to congratulate them in about two weeks.” –Jimmy Fallon “Osama bin Laden is very ecologically minded. Like, last year, it was documented by the C.I.A. that he switched to a hybrid camel.” –David Letterman

That’s our update from the winter games. Someone asked me last week if I learned anything from shooting clouds. In the words of Joni Mitchell, “I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now, from up and down and still somehow, it’s cloud illusions I recall, I really don’t know clouds at all.” Coming up next week will be our first guest blog of the year. This is one you’ll need your snow shoes for. Hope you caught some footage of the epic waves from Saturday’s Mavericks surf contest in Half Moon Bay which was described “as the best day ever.” So enjoy the skies and keep your eye on the NBA trading deadline. Aloha, mahalo and later, Kelly Slater fans.

January 24, 2010

Blast From The Last

Good morning and greetings, winter storm fans. Last week, we had five straight days of driving rain, heavy winds and big surf. I don’t want to say things were a bit moist, but it rained harder than the tears coming down the cheeks of Democrats in Massachusetts. Fortunately, my writing is covered by an umbrella clause, so I remained high and dry during the blogging process.

But in honor of our inclement weather and to celebrate the moisture we so badly needed here out west, I thought I’d pass on a few rain jokes. You know, some raincoat humor. And away we flow. There’s a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It’s called Monday. “Gosh, it’s raining cats and dogs,” said Fred looking out of the kitchen window. “I know,” said his mother. “I’ve just stepped in a poodle!” There was a communist named Rudolph. One day he looked out the window and said, “It looks like a storm is coming.” “No it isn’t,” said his wife. “Besides, how would you know?” “Because,” he responded, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”

Moving along, let’s revisit the lyrical front, where in the words of the Carpenters, “Rainy days and Mondays always bring me down.” But that is not true for yours truly, as Monday is the day that I share my flowing stream of unconciousness with the ever increasing cyber world, my parents and my rabbi. The Allman Brothers told us, “They call it stormy Monday, but Tuesday’s just as bad,” but according to Lynyrd Skynyrd, “Tuesday’s gone with the wind.” Jimi Hendrix proclaimed, “Rainy day, dream away. Let the sun take a holiday.” But our last word of precipitation today will come from the great Eric Clapton, who said, “Let it rain, let it rain, let you love rain down on me.” And that my cyber friends, is why I never carry an umbrella.

But let’s move out of the rain and into the sun. Today’s photo journey brings us back to the final day of the decade, December 31, 2009. I wanted to make sure I captured this day on the photographic front, so we start off with a lovely sunrise from Its Beach and Lighthouse Point, two locations I am as familiar with as Julianna Margulies’ character on CBS’s “The Good Wife.” It was a good start to the special day, which at this point held more promise than the violent drug war ending in Mexico anytime soon or the US convincing Afghan farmers not to grow opium. How’s that for a smooth political transition?

But wanting to make this a full day experience, much like my graduation day from driving school, I then headed up the coast to Four Mile Beach to take in the gulls and the furthering clouds expansion. The beach was deserted, except for the large flock of gulls, and they greeted me with the same warmth and understanding as did the Iraqis on our decision to continue to occupy their country. Basically, okay, you got your shots in, now get out of here and leave us alone.

For the end of the day tapestry, I returned to the coast and Its Beach. It was an extreme low tide, so I strode thru my favorite arch the same way as General Sherman did thru Atlanta in his March to the Sea back in 1864, but a tad less destructively. I was hoping for a spectacular sunset to close out the decade, but a cloud front blew in from the north, so the final shot features the last bit of pure sunlight from the decade. And because of the low tide, brilliantly colored sea anenomes and sea stars were scattered throughout the beach, all rock stars in their own right. All in all, a tremendous end to the decade, although if a few more colors had appeared in the sky, I wouldn’t have held it against the big guy, and I don’t mean Alec Baldwin.

On to Conan O’Brien’s former neighborhood. “I’ve been having a hard time explaining this whole situation to my kids, because they’re still very young. So I had a doll made of myself, and now I can show my kids exactly where NBC touched daddy. I should have known something was up when NBC sent me that 2010 calendar that only went up to January.” –Conan O’Brien “Things are crazy. I don’t know what is going on on NBC. I don’t know what going on in the ‘Tonight Show.’ Earlier today I get a call from the executives at CBS and they wanted to know if I would consider a jaw enhancement. What? Are you kidding?’” –David Letterman

‘The big CBS show here, anybody seen the ‘Medium?’ It’s about a woman who can communicate with the dead. A woman without can communicate with the dead. As a matter of fact, this Sunday, this week, Johnny Carson calls up the medium and he asks her what the hell is going on with the ‘Tonight Show.’” –David Letterman “Former presidential candidate John Edwards has finally admitted that he did father a love child with his former mistress, Rielle Hunter. He released a statement today. Edwards said, ‘It was wrong for me ever to deny she was my daughter and hopefully one day, when she understands, she’ll forgive me.’ Hey, if she inherits that hair, what’s to forgive?” –Jimmy Kimmel “The heaviest snowfall in over 60 years is being reported in Beijing, China. To give you an idea of how bad it is, the army is now having to use snowplows to run over dissidents.” –Jay Leno

“You know, it’s hard to believe President Obama has now been in office for a year. Isn’t that amazing? It’s a year. And you know, it’s incredible. He took something that was in terrible, terrible shape, and he brought it back from the brink of disaster: The Republican party.” –Jay Leno “President Obama says he blames himself for the upset in the Massachusetts Senate race because he was too remote. Meanwhile, today in Arizona, John McCain couldn’t find his remote. One of Osama bin Laden’s sons has written a book. He said his father was a cruel parent. For example, he made the kid wait until he was 18 years old before he let him blow up his first car.” –David Letterman

So that’s this week’s version of “Meet the Impressed.” Rumor has it that next week will be our first guest blog of the year, and mark my words, you will be impressed or we guarantee your money back. Caught a beautiful sunrise on Sunday that made up for the missed snow on the mountain shots from last Friday, as the clouds, just like my 9th grade algebra teacher, just wouldn’t cooperate. Hope you caught the NFC Championship game yesterday, as it had all the drama of Don Draper on a good night out. So enjoy the moisture from the skies and we’ll catch you deep in the end zone. Aloha, mahalo and later, New Orlean Saint’s fans.

January 17, 2010

Gee, Isn’t That Swell

Good morning and greetings, Dr. Martin Luther King fans. Last Monday, while most of you were having a dream, early morning risers were treated to a spectacularly colorful Monterey Bay sunrise. I had originally thought that this would be today’s lead story. But after having been to the mountain top, if you were anywhere along the coast this week, you were treated to a Olympic silver, if not gold medal performance of big waves battering the shoreline. This barrage of white water lasted a good part of the week, which was the inspiration behind today’s photo lineup. When asked for a comment about this week’s wave pictorial, one of the Righteous Brothers responded, “Your pictures are my soul and my heart’s inspiration.”

Unfortunately, we did not receive the giant swell that was expected to deliver waves up to 20 feet and higher. The swell was coming from the Gulf of Alaska and was slowed down by heavy winds blowing from the south and hot air blowing out of Rush Limbaugh. Despite the cancellation of this “high surf warning,” and epic swell, what impressed the judges most was the action down at the “blow hole,” which is located along West Cliff Drive, just south of the entrance to Natural Bridges State Beach.

This hole along the cliffs was left over from a wave powered water pump that used to force water up to a seventy-foot high tower to a 5,000 gallon tank. This was back in the olden days, when people used a horse and buggy to cruise for waves. The ocean water was then used to water down the road, much like I did the drinks at my last Super Bowl party. According to author Frank Perry, this watering down process was used for “dust control,” a problem not faced by local residents today. But then again, in the words of Kansas, “All we are is dust in the wind.”

Anyway, it was high tide and green grass forever, as the force of the waves, having traveled thousands of miles to get to this destination, were causing the spray to cascade up a good 80-90 feet in the air. Throw in the sonic “boom” of the waves hitting the cliff and the Nike “whoosh” sound as they thrust upward and it was a truly spectacular showing, much like New York Jet’s defense yesterday against San Diego.

So for those of you who didn’t make it to the edge, here is a variety pack of shots taken along West Cliff Drive. The final shot was taken on the same day from my perch at sunset along Stockton Avenue. Bottom line, Maverick’s fans, if you like big waves, this week was a good one to be alive on the planet. As my Ukranian-born grandfather’s t-shirt used to say, “if it swells, ride it.”

Let’s switch tracks for a moment. Why is there so much “hate” directed towards Haiti? The western hemisphere’s poorest nation was hit by powerful 7.0 magnitude earthquake on Tuesday, which flattened much of the nation’s capital of Port-Au-Prince, home to 2 million people. In the words of NBC’s news anchor Brian Williams, this is a place “that’s desperate on a good day.” Food and clean water were already in short supply before this catastrophic quake hit and now life there is a nightmare for the survivors. There is no water and no food. I point this out to say, please be grateful for what you have and try to not to sweat the small stuff. Like Conan O’Brien’s “Tonight Show” being cancelled on NBC or taking what Pat Robertson says seriously on Fox.

On to our late night humor segment. “I’m sure you know. NBC announced they’re pulling the plug on our show February 12th. Here’s the amazing part. That is the exact date the Mayan calendar predicted we would go off the air.” –Jay Leno “My name is Conan O’Brien, and I may soon be available for children’s parties.” According to a new TV Guide poll, 83 percent of voters — 83 percent — want me to stay at 11:35. And here’s the interesting part. When he heard this poll number, President Obama asked, ‘How can I get NBC to screw me over?’” –Conan O’Brien

“And now, according to The New York Times, Al Qaeda is claiming responsibility for the wreckage at NBC.” –David Letterman The White House said they’re working even harder now to try and find Osama bin Laden. In fact, they have now put his picture on the side of cartons of goat’s milk.” –Jay Leno
“It’s been reported that an 8-year-old boy from New Jersey is on the government’s airport watch list because he has the same name as a possible terrorist. So, it’s been a really bad week for little Skippy bin Laden.” –Conan O’Brien

David Letterman’s Top Ten Highlights of Sarah Palin’s First Day At FOX News
10. Ruined office floor by drilling for oil.
9. Detached a retina from winking at the camera.
8. Got confused — thought she signed with QVC.
7. Pistol-whipped three guys who called her “Tina.”
5. At lunchtime, Todd picked her up driving snowmobile through lobby.

So that’s our mid-January report. And if we can stay political for a moment, Congress was informed last week that the Christmas Day underwear bomber boarded his flight to frigid Detroit with no coat! This was after his father alerted the U.S. Embassy that his son had become an Islamic radical, he paid for his ticket in cash ($2,831) and he had no luggage. Unbelievable! Plus, he somehow obtained a coupon for a free headset and a second bag of mini-pretzels. Some guys have all the luck. And just when Janet Napolitano was becoming one of my favorite flavors.

Anyway, enjoy the rain this week and we’ll catch you throwing the flea flicker. And remember the words of Dr. King, when he said, “Free at last, free at last. I thank God I’m free at last.” I felt the same way when the New York Giants were eliminated from the NFL playoffs. Aloha, mahalo and later, Drew Brees fans.

November 29, 2009

Close Your Eyes And Count To Two Hundred

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , — geoff @ 9:28 pm

Good morning and greetings, NFL fans. Today, we are gathered here in holy matrimony to celebrate, commerate and exonerate the 200th posting of this blog, known world-wide as Sunrise Santa Cruz. That’s right, sports fans, what started back in August of 2007 as a simple cry for help has seemingly come of age. I like to consider this site a forum for the posting of the important issues of the day, like my unbridled love of jellied cranberry sauce, ABC’s new hit comedy “Modern Family,” and scores from Division V high school basketball. It’s a think tank for us Pepsi generation people, you know, for those who think Neil Young.

So what have I learned after a double century of blogging away like a Mark Twain on methamphetamine? To quote Edwin Starr, when asked what war is good for, “Absolutely nothing.” Well, that is not completely true. I already knew that I like to make people laugh, a trait which also functions as a great defense mechanism. We’ve heard that laughter is the best medicine. Funny, I always thought it was penicillin or tetracyline. And they also say the pen is mightier than the sword, yet, I don’t see myself entering a duel with a Bic Fine Point.

Over the years, I have found that I enjoy giving straight answers only out of necessity, leading friends, family and my court-ordered psychiatrist to often ask, “Really?” So what I’m doing today is just looking inside myself, going introspective, kind of a self x-ray or a colonoscopy of my soul. What it means is that I enjoy putting the written word down on paper, or in this case, my computer screen. That and I’m just incredibly lonely.

I guess my point is, after two plus years of blogging away without a sponsor, I am still enjoying this ride on the ferris wheel of life. I love capturing moments of nature’s magnificence, something that only God, National Geographic and Kobe Bryant can create, and sharing it with you cyber viewers. I want to thank everyone who has has been along for the ride and say that I may have already written my best posts, although my rabbi insists I still have a few good ones left in me. And for those of you who tune in for the photos, I still have the passion, the drive and model good looks to keep this site going for a long time, or at least thru the end of Hanukah.

So to celebrate this sacred occasion, or what one critic called, “The emancipation proclamation of the written word,” we are going to journey to my favorite street on planet Earth, West Cliff Drive. Or as one long-time resident told me last week, “The one thing Santa Cruz got right.” This is from the morning of November 10, back in a time when the world was filled with love, peace and happiness. Wait a minute, that’s not two weeks ago, that’s back in 1968 from a double album released by the Chambers Brothers. Not to be confused with the Isley Brothers and their 1973 hit, “Who’s That Lady,” an early tribute to Michelle Obama.

Anyway, when my brother Brad, better known on this site as the “King of Comments,” complained to me about the lack of diversity of sunrise shooting sites, I decided not to venture to the chilly sands of Its Beach at Lighthouse Point for this occasion, but instead, Bird Rock along the cliff. Yes, Brad’s scathing comments took me out of my comfort zone, but like a cat, I always land of my feet, so moving a few hundred yards down West Cliff was well worth the price of admission. And I have forgiven my youngest brother, as I know he is always looking out for my best interests, although I now refer to him in conversations as my half-brother.

I loved the colors in the sky this morning, particularly the orange-gold, creamsicle look of photo #4. The waves were smacking up against the coast as you can see in image #5. All in all, not a bad way to start the day on the left coast, for a half hour later, the sky was as colorless as a Governor George Wallace breakfast fundraiser. And just is case you’re keeping score, I shot three sunrises in November that I thought were blog worthy. And shockingly, zero sunsets, which I plan to use as a tax write-off under emotional expenses.

Let’s procede to the late night action. “The ratings just came in for Sarah Palin’s appearance on ‘The Oprah Winfrey Show.’ It earned Oprah her highest ratings since the episode where she reunited the Osmond family. Yeah, viewers who saw both episodes say Palin’s more likable but that Donny and Marie are more qualified to be president.” –Conan O’Brien “John McCain, Sarah Palin’s former running mate, read the Sarah Palin memoir. After 23 years of military service, five years as a prisoner of war, 22 years as a U.S. senator, I’m sure that John found Sarah’s story very inspirational. “A lot of people are saying that it’s too soon for Sarah Palin to write a memoir. They say she should wait until she had at least ten more years of inexperience.” –David Letterman

“The George W. Bush library design was unveiled this week by former First Lady Laura Bush. Did you know that she was a librarian when she first met George? In fact, she’s the only thing he ever checked out of a library.” President Obama is getting ready to pardon the White House turkey, the Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner. I don’t want to say Geithner is not doing a good job. But, today, God asked for his name to be taken off the bill.” –Jay Leno “On Friday, President Obama pardoned the White House turkey. Mmm-boy. Dick Cheney didn’t miss an opportunity. It proves that Obama is soft on poultry.” –David Letterman “In a long-standing Thanksgiving tradition, President Obama is scheduled to pardon the White House turkey this coming Wednesday. ‘Hey, that’s great,’ said Joe Biden. ‘I didn’t even know I did anything wrong.’” –Seth Meyers

That’s our post Thanksgiving report. In summation, I started writing this blog because there was so much going on at the time with wars, monetary stress and health issues that I wanted people to have a chance to take a moment and get away from it all. While all these things were happening, the sun was still rising and setting, the birds were singing and the Golden State Warriors were still losing. I wanted people to look, laugh, and maybe learn a little something before asking themselves, “Is he serious?” and then go back to the their lives. I hope I’ve been semi-successful. So I hope it was a pleasant holiday weekend and let’s roll into December as November is soon gone with the wind. We’ll catch you down the fairway. Aloha, mahalo and later, Tiger Woods fans.

October 18, 2009

Typhoon Goes To The Runner

Good morning and greetings, heavy rainfall fans. The biggest October storm to hit the central coast since 1962 blew into town last Tuesday and pounded Santa Cruz with torrential rains, howling winds and enormous waves. The storm also brought flooding, downed trees, mudslides and umbrella salesmen, along with closed roads, minds and beaches.

The storm came to us courtesy of Typhoon Melor, which orginated in the north Pacific and then slammed into Japan and parts of northern New Jersey. Which brings to mind the Woody Allen line from “Take The Money and Run,” when his wife, played by the lovely Janet Margolin says, “For Christmas, I’m giving you a baby.” Replied Woody, “All I wanted was a tie.”

Along with the remnants of the typhoon came furious rain. According to the National Weather Service, who provides up to the minute forecasts along with helpful baking tips, we had record rainfall as Santa Cruz received 3.16 inches, breaking the record for the day set back in 1899. Parts of the Santa Cruz mountains were deluged with over 10 inches of rain. Considering the average rainfall for Santa Cruz for the month of October is 1.4 inches, this storm was a doozy. I hadn’t felt that kind of moisture since I sweated out my draft lottery number back in the early 70’s.

So being that I like to bring to the table the best of what I see during the week, I knew what my mission was. I also knew I had to photograph this storm. So I put on my Al Roker raincoat, grabbed my camera, choked down the last few bites of a vegan meatball sandwich and headed for the coast.

Now I must apologize for the lack of clarity and some haziness in these photos. When I took these shots the rain was coming down harder than the Republicans on President Obama’s health care package. Before you could say, “Annie Liebowitz,” my lense was covered with moisture. And as all you Ansel Adams fans know, water is really good for a camera, in the same way the disgruntled Stephen Jackson will be a positive influence on the Warriors this season.

The first image is from the cliffs above Natural Bridges State Beach. As you can see from the foam, white water and hot cocoa, the ocean was pumping full throttle and generating tremendous energy that ended up flooding the beach. The next day, where there had once been dry sand, the beach was now a watery playground for seagulls, kelp sculptures and an abandoned Russian submarine.

We then move south along West Cliff Drive to view more of the slamming of the coastline. This is one of my favorite spots to shoot during a storm because of the constant fury of white water being sprayed up onto the sidewalks of West Cliff. To once again quote Woody Allen, this time from “Play It Again, Sam,” “I love the rain. It washes the memories off the sidewalk of life.”

The next two shots are from Bird Rock and Lighthouse Point. The coastline was being battered all day much like Joe Frazier was in the “Thrilla from Manila.” Or in the words of Muhammad Ali, who did the damage to Smokin’ Joe that day, “Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” And speaking of butterflies, this storm was tougher on the monarchs nesting at Natural Bridges then the English section was on my son on Saturday’s PSAT exam.

I always look forward to buffets and the day after a storm. Leaves, tree branches and insurance salesmen were scattered everywhere as I headed over to Natural Bridges to take a postgame look. I spotted these cormorants on the rock, huddled closer together than the Olsen twins on “Family Feud.”. And as you can see in the background on this shot, the waves were still pumping to the tune of a lovely shade of brown rust. And as Neil Young has told us, “Rust never sleeps.”

All in all, it was an interesting week, as on Thursday I shot my first sunrise of the season. Then on Saturday night, a gorgeous sunset filled the western sky. Unfortunately, due to my devotion to New York Yankee baseball, I wasn’t aware of what was happening in the sky until it was too late, so I can only blame myself, Yankee starter AJ Burnett and the entire cast of the “Today” show for not capturing this Saturday night special. Rest assured, sports fans, I’m still kicking myself for missing out on this amazingly colorful Kodak moment that would have appeared on these blog pages next week.

Anyway, on to the late night news of the day. “In a surprise decision, President Obama won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize Friday. In other premature awards this week: high school football player Billy Reynolds has been named this year’s Heisman Trophy winner; fifth grader Amber Collins has been named Miss America; and nine-year-old Dylan Holt has been named People’s ‘Sexiest Man Alive.’” –Seth Meyers “The Nobel Prize for lack of chemistry went to John McCain and Sarah Palin.”–David Letterman “Hey, did you see what happened today? President Obama won another Nobel prize today, this time in medicine, for pretending to give up smoking.” –Jay Leno “Last night, the White House hosted a tribute to Latin music. President Obama wiggled his hips a little on the dance floor at which point a committee in Sweden immediately awarded him a Latin Grammy.” –Conan O’Brien

“This weekend, President Obama plans to appoint his Administration’s first openly gay ambassador, David Huebner. Huebner will serve as the U.S. ambassador to Barbra Streisand.” –Conan O’Brien “Yesterday morning, Pope Benedict named five new saints to the Catholic Church, though some are questioning whether Obama really deserved it.” –Jimmy Fallon “And tonight, Obama hosted a basketball game at the White House for several members of Congress. He didn’t even want to play, he just wanted to see Congress pass something.” –Jimmy Fallon

“Colorado will become the first state ever to lower its minimum wage by 3 cents an hour, from $7.28 to $7.25. As a compromise, Colorado workers will be allowed to leave work 9 seconds earlier.” –Jimmy Fallon “Scientists are very excited about the possibility of ice on the moon. Not as excited as personal injury attorneys, but almost as excited.” –Jay Leno “Sarah Palin’s memoir will be out next month. Revelations in the memoir. “They say that during her debate with Joe Biden — the vice presidential debate — she got confused and at one point actually said, ‘I’m ready to solve the puzzle, Pat.’” –David Letterman

So that’s it for another week from the western front. Glad to have you new readers along for the ride. Enjoy the fall days as the clouds have returned to the Monterey Bay skies which can only means the NBA regular season is rapidly approaching. We’ll catch you in dead center field. Aloha, mahalo and later, Alex Rodriquez fans.

September 27, 2009

You Say Pelicant, I Say Pelican

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , — geoff @ 10:08 pm

Good morning and greetings, autumn fans. Yes, just a week ago, we experienced the change of seasons. What this means is that summer, like my 40’s, is now pretty much history. We are talking solstice city. In New England, the leaves are turning red and orange, in Colorado, the aspen trees are painted gold, while in California, my once brownish-blondish hair continues to evolve into various shades of silver.

Somehow, somewhere, in last week’s post I failed to acknowledge the passing of my favorite season. Actually, I’m very much into the Four Seasons as grew up listening to Frankie Valli. I’ll always cherish those words, “Dawn, go away I’m no good for you” yet my path still led to Sunrise Santa Cruz. Who knew besides Sherry baby and I wonder, will we ever really know if she came out tonight?

So let’s reflect back for a moment on summer, 2009, a time of love, peace and happiness, or at least that’s how the Chambers Brothers might have described it. In our own bankrupt Golden State, raging fires burned out of control, scorching everything in their path. In Washington, the Republicans felt the love and got behind President Obama and his national health care plan by shouted, “You lie!” And most importantly, in Hollywood, fireman Tommy Gavin was shot in the shoulder by his crazed Uncle Teddy in the season ending episode of “Rescue Me,” thus leaving us to wonder, will he survive this carnage and if he does, will he be covered by his health insurance? Once again, I try leaving no rock unturned in my continuing quest to probe the important issues of our day.

For this week’s photosynthesis we are looking at three days of pelican action along West Cliff Drive. The first two shots are from a feeding frenzy that was an all-day affair. The birds were going wild for some kind of baitfish that was running-I hadn’t seen a feeding frenzy like that since back in the 80’s when we used to hit the Ming Dynasty in Aptos for their Friday all-you-can-eat lunch buffet. We’re used devour those crispy eggs rolls, tangy cashew chicken and outrageously delicious garlic shrimp like they were anchovies in black bean sauce. It was pure mu shu madness.

The only thing missing from these these pelicans on parade are sounds of the screaming gulls and some sweet and sour sauce. The beautiful thing is the next morning I came back to shoot the sunrise and there wasn’t a pelican or fried won ton in sight. I later learned they had gathered at the Dream Inn to eat breakfast-turns out they’re big fans of the Ahi Benedict and the stuffed french toast.

Moving along, in the words of the Allman Brothers Dickie Betts, “You’re my blue sky, you’re my sunny day,” is where we find our next squadron of pelicans cruising the cliff before heading off into yonder. We commence today’s aviary activity with a backdrop of the clouds that have convened upon the Monterey Bay skies. The fall is always prime time on the central coast for these prehistoric-looking birds so I’m trying to be seaonally correct. I heard the other night that pelicans can actually be found in Montana, which I found rather interesting as much like myself, I thought they were only a coastal bird. Well, you know what they say, live and burn. Disco inferno.

On to the late night hilarity. “Speaking of President Bush, did you see him last night at the big football game? It was the Giants and Cowboys down there in Texas. And President Bush did the coin toss at the start of the game. Now here’s a bit of trivia. The coin that they used to start the game was the same coin that the Supreme Court tossed that won Bush the election. You know the former governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin? She’s traveling all over the world now, speaking gigs. And she went to Hong Kong and gave a speech. They paid her $300,000 for the speech, the Chinese, $300,000 for the speech. I guess she apparently could see the cash from her house.” –David Letterman “Today’s the first day of autumn, although Sarah Palin said today the dying leaves are because of Obama’s health-care plan.” –Jay Leno

“Iran President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is coming to New York to address the United Nations, but many restaurants say they won’t serve him. You can tell which ones because their signs read, ‘No shirt, no shoes, no Holocaust, no service.’ Today’s a big day. The MacArthur Foundation gave out its annual genius awards. This year’s awards went to a journalist, a mental health scientist, and a couple who sold their house three years ago. The Senate just passed a bill allowing Amtrak passengers to carry guns in their checked luggage. However, folks, Greyhound passengers are still not allowed to carry deodorant.” –Conan O’Brien

“You know who was here last night? President Barack Obama was here last night. Politics notwithstanding, what a graceful guy. I mean, after the show, he was nice enough to autograph my swine-flu mask.” –David Letterman “The U.S. government is giving American Indian tribes $224 million of stimulus money to help fight crime on reservations. The tribes say that they’re grateful for the money and plan to bet it all on black.” –Jimmy Fallon “Well, according to the Los Angeles Times, the immigrant population in California actually declined last year. When asked if they had noticed, 80 percent of the people in California said, ‘Si.’” –Jay Leno

So that’s our show for the week. Congratulations go out to the New York Yankees for sweeping the Red Sox over the weekend and clinching the American League East title. And further congrats to the Giants and the Jets, who were both NFL winners yesterday and now stand at 3-0. And if you’re a 49er fan, that was a devastating loss yesterday on a last second TD pass by 80-year-old Brett Favre. NFL action-its fantastic.

So thanks for tuning in and I hope to see this weekend at the Open Studios Art Tour 2009. I’ll be the guy in the Hawaiian shirt. We’ll catch you in the deep center. Aloha, mahalo and later, C.C. Sabathia fans.

September 6, 2009

It’s A Labor Day Of Love

Good morning and greetings, college football fans. Well, it’s Labor Day, the national holiday that traditionally signals the end of the summer for most of the nation. But that is not true for the residents of the central coast, for this day, which serves as a salute to women getting ready to deliver, brings on the start of our Indian Summer, which is not to be confused with my golden retriever Summer, Donna Summer or Johnny Winter.

Temperature and personality wise, September is our warmest month of the year here in Santa Cruz. So far this month, the days and nights have been extremely pleasant with the evening sky highlighted by the full moon that rose on Friday night. As per my recent streak of photo luck, my camera is still in the shop and it’s just not the same etch-a-sketching the rising harvest moon. But I was mistaken last week when I mentioned that my Canon replacement part was coming via rowboat. Actually, I had a choice of stage coach, covered wagon, horse and buggy or pony express. I checked the last box thinking it said Fed express, thus I’m still playing the waiting game. But as the adage says, good things and tips come to those who are waiters.

So for today’s photo fantasy tour, I thought I would share some of the wildlife I viewed this summer when I was still in possession of a working Digital Rebel. We start out with a sea lion that was lounging on the rocks in front of my old house on West Cliff Drive. The reason I’m alluding to this location is because I lived here for 14 years (1975-1989, better known as the wonder years) and never once in my lifeguarding, frisbee-throwing, cave-exploring days did I see a sea lion venture to this beach. And since my return from the southland there were no sightings until a couple of months ago, when this lovely marine mammal had its back arched up in the air like it was posing for the cover of Vogue.

Of course, being the intrepid photographer that I am, I don’t carry my SLR on these coastal walks so I scurried home like Katie Couric, grabbed my camera and Usain Bolted back to this spot. This lion of the sea was no longer in an Annie Liebowitz pose, but was snoozing on the rocks (photo #1.) I approached and asked a few questions, and as you can see from the second photo his tiny ear perked up as he was fascinated by my Bob Woodward, Deep-Throat type of reporting.

We then move over to the pond at Natural Bridges State Beach where I shot this snowy egret (photo #4) reflecting on what’s important in a bird’s life. I actually shot this a couple of years ago but it just went along too well with the previous shot, which is in a little water hole just north of Natural Bridges. I happened upon this great blue heron as he edged out from the reeds and caught him in the silver ripples. This is one of my favorite new shots that will be available for purchase at the Capitola Art & Wine Festival. And good news is, I’m right next to the Bonny Doon Vineyards so if my photos don’t work for you I’m sure the alcohol will.

We close aloha-style with a pair of North Shore geckos that were running amok on the deck and lawn of our beachfront cottage. The vibrant green fellow was climbing up and down the bamboo trees and resting in some exotically-colored plants which made for some great photo ops. The final shot depicts a brown gecko I believe I caught in the mating throws. It is giving out one of its three courtships signs with its thrush. This orange means caution, red means stop and green means go. And of course, always come to a full stop when you approach an intersection and yield to some pedestrians in a crosswalk.

On to the late night jokes. And there were plenty to choose from this week. “Former VP Dick Cheney says President Obama is setting a ‘terrible precedent,’ not to be confused with George W. Bush, who was a terrible president. That’s a different deal. In 2012, the Republicans are now talking about the presidential ticket, Dick Cheney and running as vice president Sarah Palin. Talk about your dream ticket. Oh buddy, the comedy recession is over. I mean, come on, talk about your shotgun marriage. An article in Vanity Fair claims that Sarah Palin really couldn’t see Russia from her house. The article also says that Sarah Palin was not much of a hunter. And I was thinking, I don’t know, she killed John McCain’s chances.” –David Letterman

“Summer vacation’s sadly coming to an end. Not for the Obama family. They just got back from Martha’s Vineyard. And now they’re going on another vacation to Camp David. Joe Biden is really excited for the car trip. He loves sticking his head out the window.” –Jimmy Fallon “Of course, the healthcare debate is raging. And yesterday, John McCain spoke to nearly 100 doctors and nurses. It wasn’t a political meeting. It was McCain’s annual checkup.” –Conan O’Brien “McCain at one point had to have a crazy woman removed by security at one of these town hall meetings. And I’m thinking, jeez, he should have done that a year ago.” –David Letterman

“Big election scandal in Afghanistan. The loser of the Afghanistan presidential election, a man named Abdullah Abdullah, is claiming that the winner, Hamid Karzai, artificially inflated his number of votes. In response, Karzai is claiming that Abdullah Abdullah artificially inflated his number of Abdullahs. Abdullah Abdullah says he deserves to be president and, ‘They’re going to hear from my lawyer, Shapiro Shapiro. State Department’s conducting a big investigation into a wild party thrown at the U.S. embassy in Afghanistan. Of course, in Afghanistan, a wild party is any event where a girl takes her socks off.” –Conan O’Brien

“It looks like they’re starting to get the wildfires under control. Firefighters in the LA area have been working nonstop all week long. And this morning, as a reward, Governor Schwarzenegger personally served them breakfast. Unfortunately, due to the California’s budget crisis, he was forced to charge them $12.99 each. As of today, same-sex couples may now legally get married in Vermont. So finally, finally, after years of waiting, we’ll get to hear these words out of Vermont: ‘I now pronounce you Ben and Jerry.’” –Conan O’Brien

So that’s our first post for September, 2009. And I’ve got some breaking news. No, I’m not talking soaring unemployment numbers, national health care reform or the ongong debate about the senseless war in Afghanistan. No, this week, my now 5′10″ son Jason dunked a baseball and nerf ball for the first time on a 10 foot hoop. He said he could have done it a couple of months ago but didn’t want to take the spotlight away from my summer three-point shooting clinic. You know, I love the straight A’s and the academic awards, but it’s sports and particularly basketball that coarses thru my veins. He’s getting closer to the Gilbert Family’s Mount Everest so I’ll keep you updated as he nears that Pat summit.

No blog next week as I’ll be in deep meditation at the Capitola Art & Wine Festival. Stop by and say hello, I love to see my cyber peeps. So enjoy the start of the NFL season and we’ll catch you warming up in the bullpen. And try not to sweat the small stuff. Aloha, mahalo and later, Paul O’Neill fans.

July 5, 2009

Don’t Count Your Cormorants Before They Hatch

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , — geoff @ 8:42 pm

Good morning and greetings, sports fans. Well, summer is in full swing as the dreaded June gloom is history. We now cruise into the fruits of July, which I believe are honeydew melon and the extra sweet tuscan cantaloupe. I usually like to start out the changing of the calendar with some spectacular color, but today we are going a different route, you might say, the road once taken. This is not to be confused with Bobby Frost’s the road not taken, which includes law school, medical school and traffic school. In the words of former Yankee catcher Yogi Berra, “When you arrive at the fork in the road, take it.”

I was going to blog out these sleek-bodied, sea birds nesting along West Cliff Drive back in June, but I realized that I had posted something very similar last year at around this time and the Hemingway in me said, “been there, done that.” I wanted something “fresh, exciting, so inviting to me” to kick off the July fireworks but then fate intervened.

I had taken a week off from my oceanfront activities to work on my doctorate and when I returned last week, I was in for a shock. Where there had once been over a couple dozen cormorants sitting on nests along with their mates, now there were none. The edge of the cliff was as deserted as a South Carolina Governor’s Award dinner. This was a eerie site, and I’m not talking Pennsylvania, as I had seen no eggs and certainly no young ones. I first thought that perhaps some unruly hooligans had come and scared them off. Either way, in the words of the group Spirit, “It’s nature’s way of telling you something’s wrong.”

Soon after making this unsettling discovery and ran into the most rabid of PCS basketball fans, Janet Burton, who informed me that last week she saw the cormorants “shredding and tearing up their nests.” My first thought was, was Janet hearing those voices again or were these Brandt’s cormorants not getting enough food and had to move on? Or perhaps it was the city’s upcoming budget cuts, the new revelations about the dangers of red meat or the mass confusion involving Michael Jackson’s estate. In the King of Pop’s words, “ABC, it’s easy as 123, doe re mi, that’s how easy wills can be.”

Just across the way that there were still cormorants sitting on nests, enjoying the incredible ocean view, which made this situation even more confusing. It was really quite disturbing, even more so than when McCain selected Sarah Palin as his running mate. Coincidentally, before they departed, the cormorants claimed they could also see Russia from their perch.

So let’s take a look at what we’ve got photo wise. As you see in the first shot, these black beauties have selected an gorgeous spot to raise their young. The male cormorant chooses the nest site, puts down first and last month’s rent and then attracts a female to it. Once paired in e-bird harmony, they build a circular nest on the ground made of seaweed, algae, grass, meth, sticks and stones along with names that will never hurt me. The male gathers the nest material, the female then builds the nest as the male then goes off to drink beer and watch “Baseball Tonight.”

Both the male and female incubate the eggs and both regurgitate food for their young, which is something I never got used to my parents doing. When the babies are born they are naked and helpless, which could also describe how a took my driver’s test and my years spent in the Peace Corps.

Over 3/4 of the world’s Brandt Cormorants reside in California, with most having second homes in either Tahoe or Plam Springs. Despite the high cost of housing, the largest numbers are found here on the central coast. June and July are usually the times when the reptilian-looking babies are born, so the fact that they are cleared out faster than supporters of Elliot Spitzer makes this even more of a mystery. I checked back a couple of mornings ago and the cliff was as empty as the stands at a Pittsburgh Pirate’s game. I vow to you, my cyber readers, that I will continue to search for the answers, and will not rest until I have uncovered the truth. Either that, or I will just make something up. That is my promise.

The late night boys are in reruns this week so we’ll go with a joke for a humor segment. Two ropes walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Get out of here. We don’t serve ropes in here.” The ropes go outside and one says to the other, “I have an idea.” He ties himself up, messes up his hair and goes back in. The bartender says, “Hey. No ropes.” The rope says, “I’m not a rope.” The bartender says, “You’re not a rope?” “Nope. I’m a frayed knot.”

You might want to worry, because there’s a lot more where that came from. Reports from Costa Rica tell me that Aimee’s camera broke on her second day but I’m sure she’ll come up with something for the guest blog. She’s an excellent sketcher. And Jason says he is speaking more Spanish than you’d hear at a Pau Gasol family reunion. Sources tell me they may try to squeeze in a few days in Honduras. That would be a real coup.

So that’s our report from the edge of the continent. Hope you enjoyed the holiday weekend and took a moment to think about what we were celebrating-that’s right, the invention of the barbecue. Which I believe was done soon after they signed the Declaration of Fireworks. We’ll catch you at center court at Wimbledon. Aloha, mahalo and later, Roger Federer and Andy Roddick fans.

May 31, 2009

Film At 11

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Good morning and greetings, Grand Funk Railroad fans. That’s right, folks, “I’m your captain” and thanks to my paint-by-the-numbers GPS system, “I’m getting closer to my home.” And dammit, “We’re an American Band. I saw Grand Funk guitarist Mark Farner play last summer at the Friday night concerts down at the Beach Boardwalk and he rocked Santa Cruz. I also saw Mr. Eddie Money, “Back in the 70’s when I was here, I was snorting South American countries” and the Gin Blossoms. We are talking tremendous rock and roll shows for the price of free.

For many years I passed on these mini-Woodstocks down at the beach and then one evening checked out Peter Noone and Herman Hermits and I was hooked just like Mrs. Brown and her lovely daughter. The sand, waves, barking sea lions, annoying tourists, alcohol, litter and cigarette smoke-it doesn’t get much better than that with rock and roll music blasting out over Monterey Bay. To quote the great Duke Ellington, (not to be confused with North Carolina Ellington,) “Music is my mistress.” And as Pablo Cruise once told me, “Love will find a way.”

For today’s photo fare we are going back, as the Chambers Brothers would say, in “Time.” As I’ve mentioned before, I joined the digital revolution in 2005, and much like when I broke down and ate Chinese food for the first time, a new sweet and sour world opened up for me. I had been shooting with a Canon AE1 for many years and was happy as a clam with the format. Focus, shoot a roll of 24, develop and see what I’ve got. A surprise in every envelope. Sometimes joy, sometimes disappointment, like seeing my SAT scores. But today we are going with some jump shots that worked for me, like an open 18-footer from the left side of the key.

For our first image, I went with one of my many cypress sunrise shots, this one entitled “Sky on Fire.” For years I shot the sunrise in front of the cypress tree along West Cliff before one day I finally dawned on me (no pun intended,) that this damn tree was blocking too much of the sky. I then joined moveon.org and started shooting down at Lighthouse Point.

Which leads me to photo #2, which in honor of Tommy Gavin and the “Rescue Me” boys, I call “Fire Engine Sky.” For a month in my late youth I shot with the slide format, and this red alert is a result of my slide period, which I also refer to as my first year of Algebra 1. I was using some film called Kodak Extra Color and as you can see from the rouge and the purple haze in the sky, they definitely didn’t cheat me on the color front. Not to toot my own Lena horn, but the Communist Party named this shot their 2004 photo of the year.

For our next two vertical entrees we move north (although some might say west) along West Cliff Drive. For some reason this morning I mistimed the sunrise. I woke and saw a beautiful red cumulus ribbon covering the sky. I then scooted down to the cliff and caught the aftermath (or was it afterscience) of the sun rising over the fog bank which I call “Glory Clouds.” Karma, clouds, parsley, sage, rosemary and time were on my side that morning.

We then move up to Swift Street to see a double rainbow doing stand-up in the Pacific. This was the beach that I lived across from during my West Cliff wonder years from 1975-1989. Living on the edge of the continent and photographing rainbows was not easy, with the daily distractions of migrating whales, countless chains of sea birds and endless droves of roller skaters. And definitely not in that order.

For our last two shots we are moving out of town but staying in state. The fifth shot is from New Year’s Day, 2004, back in Palm Desert, when the sky lit up with brilliantly colored, cotton-puffed clouds that just blew my mind. As I’m writing this I’m reminded of another fantastic, blood-red sunset from Palm Desert that I will feature later this summer. Due to technical difficulties, I did not make it out to the desert this year but from what I hear Sherman’s Deli (with two convenient locations in Palm Springs and Palm Desert) is still doing major rye bread, corn beef and chocolate rugala business without me.

The final shot was taken in lovely Hermosa Beach sometime in the 1990’s. There weren’t a lot of memorable moments of color in the sky during my decade in the southland but this was one of the nights of photo greatness. Living in the most densely populated city in the U.S., I found myself engulfed in the warm Pacific while the sun was setting from April thru October. Throw in third row season tickets to the Lakers at the Fabulous Forum during the Magic Johnson years, which was a magical and James Worthy experience in itself and sunsets took a back seat to the Laker Girls. Hermosa Beach was like living in a giant outdoor health club, but that’s a sideout story for another blog.

On to the late night news. “Well, the big story is the Supreme Court. President Obama has found his nominee. She is a Federal appeals judge. Sonia Sotomayor, a Latino woman, how about that? So, you know what that means. Ruth Bader Ginsburg no longer the hot chick on the court. If confirmed, Sotomayor would be the country’s first Hispanic judge. In fact, her first order of business, deporting Lou Dobbs.” –Jay Leno “History was made today when President Obama nominated Judge Sonia Sotomayor as the first female Hispanic justice to serve in the U.S. Supreme court. Obama said this should help keep the court from leaning too far to the white.” –Jimmy Fallon

“North Korea tested another nuclear bomb. The fear is that North Korea will sell this nuclear weapon to some unstable, volatile world leader, you know, like Dick Cheney.” –Jay Leno “There are some people who are saying that maybe Dick Cheney is setting himself up to actually run for president. You know, it makes sense. Republicans are looking for fresh blood, and Cheney just had some yesterday.” –Bill Maher

“Barack Obama and Dick Cheney have been going at each other all week. This is like big-time wrestling, isn’t it? Man, it’s like charisma versus arrhythmia. I can’t believe Dick Cheney keeps giving speeches. He’s appearing on TV news shows. It’s like he thinks he is still president. A new pentagon report says that 1 in 7 inmates released from Guantanamo Bay has gone back to terrorism. Surprisingly, the other 6 are working in customer service.” –Jay Leno

So I hope you enjoyed today’s blast of colors from the past. And congratulations to the Lakers and the Magic, who will meet in the NBA Finals that begin on Thursday. What this means is no LeBron James, who put on an INCREDIBLE show during the playoffs but who failed to show up for the Game 6 postgame press conference. It guess it all comes down to the words of Mahatma Gandhi who once said, “Defeat is worse than death, you have to live with defeat.”

As you can imagine, there are few more Fuji like images in the archives that we will later revisit. On Friday morning, I took a few shots of a coyote in the misting rain which we’ll see coming down the pike. So enjoy the Kodak colors and we’ll catch at the Staples Center. And welcome to June. Aloha, mahalo and later, George McGinnis fans.

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